Lawrence Notes 2

Lean’s Notes: Page 2

loa11n

Return of Lawrence, Gasim and Daud. For the above reasons (a sense of being leisurely) I would cut from the extreme long shot of Daud meeting Lawrence and Gasim to Ali hitting the ground with his stick. Thus cutting out the one shot of Farraj sitting waiting and looking down at the encampment below. So it would go. Long shot Daud wheeling around Lawrence and Gasim. Ali hitting the ground. Long shot Lawrence and Daud's camel appearing (the music starts here) Farraj jumping and yelling, "Aurens!"

loa13n

Wadi Rumm. I don't like at all the new cut from "Come dine with me in Wadi Rumm!!" to the little girls close up. It makes Quinn a ham to declaim the line which leads into an intimate close up. I was wrong and Sam was right. I would go from Quinn's line to the Long shot as was BUT I would print it right down so as to give a near dusk effect. Then I would dissolve straight into the middle of the tracking shot inside the tent (after the child and the women) so that almost the first thing that happened was that the men were entering to carry out the feast on the tray.

loa15n

Exit from Wadi Rumm. I would cut--The first shot (after "The mother mated with a scorpion.") of the men yelling "Auda Abu Tayi." The second shot of Auda saying, "Akaba!" and "Make God your agent." The fourth medium shot of Auda riding towards camera saying, "God be with you." The fifth panning shot of Lawrence and Ali moving off. I would start by dissolving from "Mother mated with a scorpion" to the present sixth shot which is a long shot of the whole procession with Auda passing by followed by Lawrence and Ali. I would cut to the first shot taken from inside the tent with the women as is. The extreme--and most spectacular Long shot--as is. The second tent shot as is. The start of the singing etc. as is--but-- After Lawrence turns around and sees the close shot of the men singing I would cut straight from the close shot of the men to the second extreme long shot of the women trilling in the foreground and the whole army spread out in the background--and then continue as is. Think this would do the trick and I have no regrets. (As far as the sound is concerned I would work backwards so we get the same result of the increasing drum noise which take us to the moon. The first tracking shot of women trilling was--I think--a pre-mix, and it would just mean that the men singing would increase their tempo earlier.)

Akaba. I like the idea of the dissolve from the end of the charge to the red sun over the sea In spite of the fact that I wouldn't take most critics advice as to how to shoot an insert. I do know that several of them have remarked on too many sun shots. I think this shot may be the one that breaks their back. Therefore I suggest for your consideration that we dissolve from the end of the charge to the rioting in the town which pans to Lawrence on his camel going into the sea. Again this is not done from a footage-length point of new but an attempt to eliminate criticisms of repetition. I would hat to cut my other sun shots as all the others have a real point--while this is solely mood.

Cairo. I have had two separate face-face criticisms about the scene between Allenby, Lawrence, Dryden and Brighton by the goldfish pool. The people say they cannot believe that Allenby would discuss military matters with Lawrence in front of a lot of gooping. I got in a mess with the scene, Robert, and I know I didn't put over your intention which was that Allenby was doing this on purpose. I think two shots particularly do the damage: The first shot of the Club secretary which is a dissolve from the scene in the bar. The final shot of the first goldfish sequence with the officers peering downwards from the courtyard windows. I therefore suggest that we dissolve from the bar to the shot of the group around the fountain, thus cutting out the Club secretary shot. (this may cause trouble as we will have to add to the front of the group shot in order to have enough dissolve footage but as there is no violent movement I don't think the loss of 2 pictures will show.) In the case of the second shot which ends with the spin to the feet I would suggest trying a direct cut from Allenby saying "Certainly!" to the tracking shot of the feet a foot before the first line. (This would cut out Lawrence's close up which ends with him looking up in addition to the spinning shot which I know Sam loathes anyhow. Would have to try this on the cutting copy. My guess is that it will work.

Loss of Interval. Yes please. Ann [V. Coates-editor] will be able to time this, but my guess is that we should fade out on a 6 footer starting the fade where the fade in on the Interval title now begins. We should have, of course, to loose the music and have only footsteps.

If the interval cutting idea works in whatever place Sam is going to try it out I think we may have to examine the idea of fading in a few feet later on the shot of Bentley coming up over the hill. We have got to take care here as this is the only fade out in the picture and will therefore have a punctuation all of its own. Added to this I shot it (the Bentley shot) as a curtain raiser. Don't' take a lump off it but consider a 6 foot fade in so that Bentley's head can be seen on about the fourth foot. We don't want to replace a major hiatus with a minor.